Friday, November 17, 2003

Mooch has been sent on the Path.

We took him to Open Door Animal Sanctuary Saturday.  At the time, I already felt guilty for packing him off and leaving without much goodbye.  I was trying not to be to attached nor sentimental.  I wished him good luck and left.

I knew the risk that he might test positive for a disease.  I had hoped and prayed that he'd beat the odds, but when they took him to the vet today, he tested positive for Feline AIDS.  So they put him to sleep.  The Sanctuary can't spend resources on isolating sick cats to live out whatever time they have left.

Right now, I feel really awful, because I was the one who pushed this, with the best of intentions.  Now, he's dead and it's my fault.  It feels like rationalizing that at least he had a few days being warm, well-fed and well cared for.  It's not any better to say he was saved from a slow, cruel death and it kept him from spreading the disease.  He probably got it from someone else.

And that's the problem I face with the Little Girl.  She may have it, too.  She's going to be damn difficult to get into a cage to take her to the vet as it is.  And now, there's a better than even chance that I'm going to have to have her put down, too.  This sucks.